Lots of New

I haven't written in a few weeks. I've been busy. I've been busy with a lot of NEW.

New has always been scary to me. I like routine. I like knowing what is coming my way. I like knowing what my schedule is going to look like. I like knowing when and where I can do the things I need to do.

But my life - as of late - has been shaken up.

I have a new job. I'm still getting used to my new - and still changing body. I have a new boy. I start a new chapter in my schooling on Monday. All of these things in my life are great and welcome. Yet, now I need to stop and figure out how to juggle all of the new that is hitting me at once.

So far - I think I've done alright. I have taken these past four weeks to work out A LOT. I went in the mornings, leaving my house for the gym before my sister headed to work some mornings. I worked out in the evenings. I ate healthy. I slept a lot. I read theater theory, I memorized monologues and a certain Shakespeare sonnet which ate my lunch. I went on dates. But most important, I took care of myself. I didn't stress. I didn't freak out because my schedule wasn't set. I just let it happen.

And what I learned in just letting it all happen is that I can still make the good choices. I have lost 12 pounds this month. It's one of my biggest months since the beginning of this journey. And yet, I have been less structured than ever before. I trusted in my abilities to make good choices and still live my life. And I still succeeded.

I'm going to remember this in the coming weeks. Monday I embark on 12 hour class days and from what I've been warned - crazy amounts of homework. And I'm going to still try to juggle this great guy, my family and friends and prep work for my new job at my new school. And yet, I am more confident now than ever before that I can still be successful. I can do this.

I've made plans. I'm going to work out in the mornings and enjoy it. I'm going to bring my lunch and dinner everyday. I'm going to work during lunches and dinners when I can. I'm going to make this work. And in six weeks - when I return from Europe - I will be even lighter and even more healthy.

Life happens. And it's an absolutely beautiful life. It's time for me to really live it.