The Balence Beam

Two weeks ago I was having a conversation with a couple of my friends that have been speech coaches for years and I made the comment that I am trying to find the magic pill that will make everything in my life balanced. They both died laughing and told me if I find that magic balance - to please share with them my secret.

So that is where I am at. I'm still struggling with finding balance. My life is so full. I have work - with includes teaching a new subject (which I'm really enjoying), running a speech program that involves traveling to debate tournaments most weekends and helping with the fall musical, taking on a great deal of the business details. Then I have a great man in my life. He is patient and kind and thankfully is fine with the fact that I just don't have a lot of extra time. Then there is my home life - trying to help my parents around the house (which I fail at miserably) and spending time with my family (which again, I often fail miserably at). And at the end of all of that, I still need to work out, eat, shop and do laundry.

I often feel like I am chasing my tail. Like I don't know which way is up and which way I should be heading. I love this life - I love all the components and I feel guilty even writing this blog because I have it good - and I mean that. But even though all the components are good, I still have to find the balance. I'm not balanced right now. I'm letting certain categories monopolize my time and at the end of the day, I'm not putting myself high enough on the food chain. And putting myself higher on that food chain means that I will make my workouts a priority and take care of myself.

My workouts are for me. They make me feel good. They help me sleep better. They release stress that I build up at work, etc. And I have to stop letting them be the thing that I don't give enough attention. I have to just deal with the fact that the gym isn't "on my way home" anymore and drive to the gym each night happily. I know that with my new schedule that I'm not going to be able to give my two hours each night that I was used to giving last year. But just because its got to be different, doesn't mean its bad.

I've come so far in this journey but its not over. And I have to remember that and keep working towards my goal. I've come to far to to stop and go backwards. And to continue to go forwards, I have to just bite the bullet and find balance that includes taking care of me.

It's not going to be easy and there is definitely going to be some trial and error involved but I will figure it out. I have figured it out up to this point. This is just another little trial.